The Terrible Twos - How to Stay Sane When Your Child Is Not
If you have a little one who is anywhere between the ages of two and
four, some days can seem like they last forty eight hours instead of
twenty four. If you are the proud mother of a little girl this age, the
only word in her vocabulary may be "No." If you try and counter her
"no's" with "yes's", she may emit sounds so shrill your ears will bleed.
If you are the proud mom of a little boy, his new habits may include
coloring the dog with your lipstick or banging your favorite, and
delicate, table with his toy trucks until they crack. How do you deal
with this? One way of course is to leave the country and never return.
There are, however, more reasonable ways in which to deal with your
children's testing periods.
While you may not be able to move to China, you can remove yourself from
the situation and help calm your frayed nerves. If your child is being
rebellious or misbehaving, sometimes just stepping out of the room for a
few moments, counting to ten, and taking some deep, calming breaths can
make all the difference when you re-enter the room to deal with your
misbehaving child. He or she may then start to associate your leaving
the room with "Uh oh, Mommy is mad" rather than associate your screaming
and yelling with being angry, which can only be detrimental. This may
help calm the child enough that upon your return, he or she will be more
receptive to your teaching him what behavior you didn't like. Since you
will be calmer as well, the discipline will likely be more effective.
For a more long-term approach, taking some time for yourself and
"getting away from it all" is a good bet to restore your sanity. Take a
good block of time on a Saturday or Sunday, 2 hours, maybe, and mark
this time in your calendar in pen, not pencil, as a recurring activity.
Keep a standing appointment with yourself, and honor it as you would any
other. Think you are too busy on a weekend to do this, between your
toddler's play dates, errands, and your other family obligations? You
will feel much more productive the rest of the weekend allowing yourself
this little ‘refresher', rather than trying to cram some time in on a
random Tuesday or other weeknight. Moreover, you will feel much more
able to cope with your child's behavior. For this special "adult
time-out" time, you can book a massage or a facial at your favorite spa.
Take a couple of hours to go window shopping or visit a museum, by
yourself or with a friend. Take in a movie with a couple of girlfriends.
If your husband is willing to fly solo on a Saturday night, you can even
steal away to your favorite local pub with the girls once in a while and
let off some steam. If you don't have extra funds for these activities
once a week, you can sneak yourself off to the tub with a good book, a
bubble bath and a nice glass of wine and come out feeling ready to face
the world and your terrible-two-year-old.
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